I’ve been having a hard time coming up with things to blog about- not for lack of things happening, but because I have a chronic problem of feeling my life isn’t important enough to write about. This is a feeling shared by the entire system, so you can imagine why we may be a little slow to write up a blog.
This past Monday. We finally got to talk to our therapist about the terrible flashback problem that had only gotten worse over the weekend. I told her why, for one night at least, I thought they were bad (our mother and her boyfriend having some alone time) but I told her they had been bad even before my moms friend had come over.
Now this appointment was done by Elijah, which isn’t his usual territory. I think he may have mad our therapist a bit nervous by his never ending blank stare. She and Elijah got a long well though, thankfully. He is a protector who certainly needs his own time to work though the things he’s fronted for.
She commended him for being able to comfort Kenny while in a flashback, and for thinking quickly enough at one point to pull us out from some serious emotions with some cold snow. The snow is melting though, and with our mothers boyfriend being a almost every weekend thing (meaning we can’t just jump into the bath), our therapist suggested scent as a way to pull us out.
Yesterday we finally found something that may work. It’s a roll on scent that smells calming and gentle. Though it was very expensive, which I guess is okay if it works.
Have any of you ever tried scent to pull yourselves out of a flashback? We’ve never tried it before, but can see how it could help.
Other than that, this week I think ends Kennys long period of fronting by himself. For the last two days, I (Cloud) have been default fronter. I’m glad Kenny and Roo are taking a step back from fronting for long periods of time. Neither of them are very well cut out for long term fronting since they both have a heavy trauma burden.
With me fronting now, two of the less experienced parts have kind of latched onto me for front time. It’s very sweet having two puppy dog like people following you around and asking questions. So thank you Lolli and Ox for being so sweet.